Friday, October 4, 2013

Waters II

treading water.


the threat of drowning so close. 

what i wish i had known....

1. take the advice "don't show them a smile" seriously. very seriously. 
And do not smile. For at least a month. 
Because they will take that smile and eat you for breakfast.

2. growing up involves coming to accept the imbalance of good days and bad days.... and it can be bad weeks with barely a fleeting reassuring moment to get you by.

3. don't club with your male co-workers. bad idea. messy and awkward.

4. don't think you're better. just when you think you know better... that you are better.... a deeply humbling event is waiting around the corner. 
there's no way to prepare yourself to be so profoundly humbled. 

5. accept and seek help. own your mistakes and the decisions you have made. fear and insecurity will drown you. honesty will be your healer. 

"here i stand on the edge of the ledges i have made."  ng-"ledges"